I have so much to do, and I dont yet have the time to organize them all and frankly, i have not yet been inspired to actually change the layout of my little site (and a lot of this has to do with me forgetting HTML and then my lack of knowledge of CSS). So until then here are some ideas.

1. Project: Overhaul 4.0 will be put on hold until I have come up with a better plan. It shall be renamed Project: Overhaul 4.1 due to the fact that it's a major change from what has been stated in the current project.

2. Since I'm such a camwhore, I'll also try to put up a section for photoblogging. I think that it's a great idea. But so that people wont start getting sick of seeing my face the whole time, I would be putting stuff there that's not only me, but other topics as well. With that in mind, I need to have a digicam and a working pc. hahahaha

--update: got my new pc!

3. Serious life routine changes need to take effect immediately.

4. I also need to get the following ASAP
- The Book of Answers
- an altar

5. I also have to learn how to budget my time. Recently, I think that I have been spreading myself too thin for so-so reasons. I think that I need to do something more worthy of my time.

6. New dog.

Again, while Project: Overhaul 4.0 is on hold, this will be the main enrty that you would see (at least here in this site) for these things will be my main focus for the coming months.

Now, here's what you're supposed to do... And please do not spoil the Fun. Copy and paste this into your notes, delete my answers, type in your answers and tag 20 of your girl friends to answer this. Then see what happens. BOYFRIEND POTENTIAL SURVEY:

1.dapat ba gwapo?
-oo naman

2. matalino?
-preferrably

3. preferred Age?
-wala naman, pero nakukuha ko usually older than me. pero wala talaga akong preference for age

4. preferred height?
-same height or taller. pwede rin siguro smaller pero konti lang

5. How about sense of humor?
-kailangan yan para hindi boring

6. How about piercings?
-ok lang kahit saan, wag lang masyadong madami siguro

7. Accepts you for who you are?
-heller

8. Pink hair?
-nope

9. mushy or no?
-oks lang

10. Thin or fat?
-thin pero wag nmn masyado thin, ayoko din masyadong fat

11. Moreno or chinito or mestizo?
-kahit ano hahahaha

12. Long hair or short hair?
-basta bagay

13. Plastic or metal?
-i dong know what this means

14. Smells good?
-ay kailngan, pramis

15. Smoker?
-yeah, pag-non smoker kasi parang mahirap pakisamahan, pero oks lang kahit hinde,

16. Drinker?
-ok lang

17. Boy-next-door type?
-oks lang

18. Musically inclined?
-cool, but not required

19. Plays piano?
-oks lang

20. Plays bass and/or acoustic guitar?
-oks lang

21. Plays violin?
-too weird for me, pero...

22. Sings very well?
-hotness

23. Vain?
-wag naman masyado

24. With glasses?
-sure keri lang hahaha

25. With braces?
-hindi ko pa natatry with braces...

26. Shy type?
-wag naman masyado

27. Rebel or good boy?
pwede both? charoz --> onga

28. Active or passive?
-active. ako na yung passive eh.

29. tight or bomb?
ha? --> di ko rin gets to

30. Singer or dancer?
errr… kahit ano

31. Suplado?
not too suplado baka hindi naman niya ko pansinin --> onga hahaha!

32. Hiphop?
-ayoko

33. Earrings?
maybe just one ear. NO BLINGS! --> korek

35. Torpe?
pwede hahaha

36. Mr. count-my-ex-girlfriends-un

-pwede rin siguro....hahahaha

Well, at least *some* updates.

First off, I would like to say sorry to this website because I have totally ignored it in the past few months (counting 5 months since my last real login, I think.) I've been busy with a myriad of different things and between keeping my sanity and the house, it has really been a whirlwind of shit coming in from all directions

Not that this time around is a breather, but I finally just found a few moments to spare and share (if you are a fan of this page, which is probably not the case). I think, to be honest, I am typing/writing here because I know that no one reads this anymore and that everyone else is busy with facebook or multiply or twitter or plurk.

Now on to the juicy stuff.

Life isnt all that great, in fact it's been so low that I'm hoping that the old adage, when you're all the way down, have hope because there's nowhere else to go but up, applies to me. In all aspects I would say.

Project: Overhaul has proven to be effective, but it still needs a little change here and there, and again, the main problem is time and execution. I am giving this more thought and expanding the project in other aspects to complete the "overhaul". I've also received feedback from some folks saying a variety of things. A good thing, but I want to drive them to a common reaction.

I've also had a little action when it comes to love life, take note, it's literally just a little and some action. I have learned a lot from those encounters both good and (mostly) bad. I think I've grown up a little more now. If I could only go into another relationship, then that would be great. But I dont think I can take a repeat incident of that, so that's why I'm mainly redirecting my focus to the Project and to my career.

If you would recall, about 4 years ago, I had a dream. I think that circumstances are forcing me into fulfilling that dream. Not that I dont want that to happen, it's just that its another adjustment and I'm horrible at that. But it is a welcome change. Like they said, there's no other way but go up so I guess it'll be a good move for me. I've also been thinking that it might not just be a good move for my career but overall. I'm still listing down the cons of it, but all the pros way out weigh the cons. An indication that the only reason I'm not pursuing it is because I am afraid.

REJECTION. A word a lot of people hate. And it's not just love life. When it comes to everything else, it becomes reaaally frustrating. Well, it's one thing I share in common with a lot of different people. Anyway, all this---since the start---has been a really good learning experience (although one that I wont repeat) and I have finally seen where this is going. I know what to do, and slowly but surely, even with this....uh....handicap, I will finally break through and be happy with my life.

I would like to apologize to my readers as I have not updated this site in a looong time. I've been busy with so many other things that (real life and online) that I remembered just now that this is my place of refuge. I guess we should begin with updates.

1. Well, Project: Overhaul 5.0 has finally given results and I like it.

2. I am no longer with Convergys. That place is nice, yes, but I think that it's time that I moved on.

3. I'm trying to pursue a career as a flight attendant. I've always wanted to be one. I never wanted to be in a desk all day. And people would say it's dangerous, but that's part of the thrill.

4. I'm enjoying my month long vacation. I know that after all this, it'll be mindless work again. So I'm grabbing all the me time I can get. Ü

5. Snowy made it! We're trying to fatten him up muna before I take pictures hahaha! Fuck Parvo!

6. I upgraded Maxx into something better. Too bad the motherboard has a broken RAM slot, so I'll have to take him back to the shop prolly next week.

7. I'll be back with a vengeance.

8. I have so many things to accomplish for myself before I start dealing with the rest of the world again.

That's pretty much it. I'm not gonna go into details anymore. Past is past and I'm letting go.

Before the day ends, I would like to greet everyone...

Merry Christmas!

Yeah, that sounds just right. I gotta hit myself hard enough to wake up. I guess this is as close to a pride check as anyone would try to classify this. I dunno. I'm just blabbering as we speak. I dare not place this where anyone in the Material Plane could access of they choose to. I mean, none of the people or "friends" that I see every day traverse the Plane of Shadow or they probably have found some other plane or material plane in which they have migrated to.

Anyway. So I tried applying "upstairs". I got called. Did the demo. Apparently, since my destruction from the Material Plane of Toril, and while I was in spirit mode, my skills got rusted. If I would apply a D&D3.5 term here, you could call it...gaining a negative level. Yeah, I guess that's the closest for anyone who would care to interpret that. Since I'm all rusted, I dont think my demo had enough ammo to have the people from the Clockwork Nirvana of Mechanus to revive me. I could blame this on several people but I think I wont. I think this time around, I will admit to failure.

Yeah, that's what this is. An admission post of sorts. I think this is the year that I will hate the most. True, some good things did happen but a lot more shitty events happened. And from what I've learned so far, it's not enough that the ruler of Toril has seen to my destruction. She wishes to have my spirit consumed as well. I dont know what to do anymore. There are other options, yes. But they both pale in comparison to the Clockwork Nirvana of Mechanus and the Material Plane of Toril (at this point I'd say it's Abier [post-Spellplague]).

Now, you might ask, why do I think I failed? The petitioners for Mechanus all went through the same initial process that I did. What happened after was different. And I think that is something to consider. I probably am getting ahead of myself (as always) but it's always better to assume that. I will need to prepare for my presence in Arborea. That's not to say I am giving up hope, but mahirap na umasa. And so, prepare I shall.

I dunno. I guess I'm just thinking out loud. But this is my time to prepare. Nasaktan lang ako sa prospect na maangatan pa ako ng mga mauuna sa akin. Hindi ko sinasabi na hindi nila deserve yun. Qualified naman sila eh. Ang masakit dun, ako yung stuck. Yung hindi na nakaalis at umangat. Ang masama pa dun, nag-regress pa. Yes, this is totally my fault. I am blaming myself for this. And one of the reasons why I'm saying this here in the Plane of Shadow is masakit at mahirap na maging masaya ka na nakaangat sila. Hindi ka rin naman pwedeng magalit dahil wala kang karapatan. Hindi mo pwedeng ipakita na hindi ka masaya kasi ampanget naman nun, rude. So ngiti ka sa labas pero todo ang bitterness pag mag-isa ka na.

Ewan. Siguro kailangan ko na lang talaga mag-focus sa mga importanteng mga bagay and keep up appearances kung kinakailangan. A solution should present itself soon. I just have to relearn my skills and be patient.

The sun shined bright that day, and the colorful flags of the fair swayed in the wind. The markets were bustling people and wares of all sorts are spread out. Exotic cuisines from distant lands, mundane equipment, baked goods, hunting weapons of all sorts, fruits and vegetables and arcane components are scattered all over.

Three young men in bright robes, signifying their station or nobility, were walking down to the market, to see what they could get. They were students of the arcane, studying under a very well known wizard. Today, they have decided to test their newly learned skills and abilities, and what better way to test it when the market is crawling with people who are also familiar with magic.

"I dont think you can do it." Said the young mage with a shaved head. "You haven't even mastered the simple light spell, and you think that you can try to move from one place to another instantly?"

"I think I can." replied the red haired mage. "I've read the scroll very carefully, and I think I should be able to cast it without any problems. I found a spare scroll in my uncle's study. I've been memorizing the spell for three days now. I think I can do it."

"Then this perhaps warrants a contest." replied another man with blonde hair. "I have learned a few spells myself. And you" he said to the bald mage "dont think I dont know that you can cast dimension door yourself. I've seen you look through the spell in the academy several times."

"Okay, so what kind of contest are talking about?" said the bald mage
"The falls outside the city, we're all very familiar with the place, I think that's the best place to go to." said the blonde youth
"Fine." said the the fiery mage, "I'll go first. If you dont get there in time, it's your turn to buy us ale at the tavern."

Without waiting for his companions to agree to his deal, he started his newly learned incantations. As he completed the spell, flames started to appear in the air; he used his hands to pry open the flame that eventually shaped itself into a portal of sorts. Without looking back, he stepped in and the flaming portal closed.

"Did you see that?" said the bald mage.
"Yes, something is very wrong. I think he didnt say the spell right..." the blonde mage responded.
"We'll find out when if he doesnt get there when we do." finished the bald mage. He uttered mystic words and his shadow moved to touch another's shadow and from there he descended from within his shadow.

The blonde mage, seeing that he had no other choice, followed the two. With a couple of words arcane words, he took to the skies. He knew from the lessons from their master that planar travel is a very risky business. He was sure that his friends had at least the precaution to protect themselves from the natural hazards of the Elemental Plane of Fire and the Plane of Shadows.

....meanwhile
The flames opened to a dismal place. This place was devoid of color and as if he was looking through smoked glass. After gathering his wits about, he deducted that something had gone wrong with his spell and it transported him elsewhere. He saw three robed figures from a distance. They were in a dark place, a place where the walls of this plane perhaps touched another. It did not seem that they noticed him, so he decided to move closer to hear what they were talking about. He couldnt fully understand what they were speaking of and he could only gather information based on what he could glean on their discussion. Fortunately, he had learned the language of the Infernal Planes as they were conversing in that dark language.

Robed Figure 1: .......sacrifice..?
Robed Figure 2: ....blood......death.......I......no........achieve that?
Robed Figure 3: ......the effect........two birds ...one stone.
Robed Figure 2: How?
Robed Figure 1: Are..................that........sacrifice.......instead?
Robed Figure 3: Yes. We eliminate the villain and we will have enough power for our own ascension.
Robed Figure 2: Then it is best that we----

The darkness consumed him. The cold touch of the void claimed him and piercing daggers of cold had covered his body. Then the silence broke and it was clear to him now. The colors of the world had returned and two familiar faces were there beside him. The cold mountain water splashing on his face.

I used to have a barkada. Super close like any barkada. Ngayon wala na. I'm not saying that hindi ko na sila makontak. I'm saying na somehow, somewhere back there, sometime ago, I drifted. Super naiba yung path ko sa kanila. Hindi na kami nagkikita. Dati every week nagkikita kami, malling, chilling or kung anong trip. The weeks became months, the months became years. 

I'm happy for the people na super daming katext, to find out na barkada nila yun. Kainggit. Shempre, kasi wala ako nun. I have a super bestfriend, and that's fine, pero one day nga nagkekwentuhan kami about adding other people in the group. Pero parang hindi namin magawa or kung nagagawa man namin super tagal. 

So sino ang mga kandidates? Schoolmates. Hindi ko naman talaga ka-close yung mga kasama ko nung college, so Fritz lang. His working his way to become the greatest martial artist in the world (haha, goodluck p're!). Highschool? Busy silang lahat. Nagkikita pa rin naman pero hindi na kagaya nung dati. May mga ibang priorities na rin. Pero at least meron pa rin kahit papaano sa kanila. Kapitbahay? haha, wala na silang lahat. Hindi ko na nga alam kung ano meron kina Ole, Dindin, Wayne, Rachel, Boswell, Donabelle eh. Officemates? Hindi ko rin masabi. Oo nga at medyo naging close kami ngayon as compared to the last 3 years. (or maybe it's just me)

Wala lang, namiss ko lang yung times na meron kayong sariling tambayan, and dun kayo lahat nagkikita, and always mo silang makikita dun. Or yung isang text lang, kahit wala lang, go na agad. Or yung pahirapan! Yung sunduan/paalaman blues. Namiss ko din yun. Yung kailangan buong barkada pagoodshot sa parents ng lahat para mapayagan sa concert ni [insert rocker/artist here]. Of course matanda na kami so hindi na mangyayayari ito (except for one person I know. Buti na lang wala syang multiply hahaha). 

Doesnt it feel nice to belong? Kahit na hindi sa syota or sa pamilya. Yung meron ka talagang group of friends na makikipagpatayan para syo? 

But enough of this, may mga kailangan pa akong tapusin. Until next time na lang.

**system log: [message] ALERT! Unidentified, Unreasonable, Unavoidable conflict detected.
**system log: defense mode activated
**system log: initiating evasive maneuvers
**system log: charging plasma shields
**system log: preparing safety pods
**system log: initiating neutron ionization
**system log: casting protection from evil, protection from chaos
**system log: casting tortoise shell, silent wall, wall of force
**system log: preparing contingency: teleport
**system log: preparing contingency: plane shift
**system log: preparing contingency: shadow walk
**system log: systems ready